ImprovAcadia transcript

Here is a transcript of what happened onstage at ImprovAcadia.
I was called up onstage and as
ked questions about my relationship. I don’t know what the game was supposed to be, but the host assumed I would tell the truth. I planned on telling the truth, but what the hell. I’m a comedy writer who loves improv.

“Hi, What’s your name?” the host asked.
“Jeanne,” I said.
“How long have you been in a relationship?”
“Two years.”
“Are you married or . . . ?”
“We’re married.”
“Where is your husband now?”
“Prison.”
“How long has he been prison?”
“Two years.”
“Then how did you meet him?”
“I saw him on TV and felt sorry for him, so I started writing him letters.”
“What did he do?”
“He embezzled money from his company. That’s why I can see him on weekends.”
“What do you do?”
“I’m a writer.”
“Books?”
“Yes.”
“What genre?”
“Exercise.”
“What’s the title of one of your books?”
The Every Excuse in the Book Book.”
“Where is your husband in prison?”
“San Francisco.”
“Which prison?”
“Alcatraz.”
“Alcatraz?! It has been closed for decades.”
“It was re-opened just for him. He can’t swim.”

At this point the host knew I was pulling her leg and asked me to go back to my seat. The players moved onto the next game.